This is Day 4 of the How to Feel Human as a Mom series.
It’s plaguing us as moms, because as ironic as it sounds, social media and the online world has left us feeling more alone than ever.
Daily I have clients cry to me, feeling that they are the only ones who are suffering with feeling like motherhood is hard, with mom guilt, with the urgency to fix their bodies into something better, with their struggles around food and exercise and priorities.
And when they tell me this, it breaks my heart into pieces because they think I’m the only person who understands. Meanwhile, I’m thinking of the 15 other clients who would relate to these struggles on a deep level.
It’s the entire reason I created the Strength in Mothers mentorship, a group of moms who meet online weekly to work through these issues and support each other. And in my opinion, it’s also the reason it’s the most successful program I have (and closest to my heart).
We need each other, we need a safe space, WE NEED A VILLAGE. It feels so validating when someone else just gets us, just knows exactly how hard it is to balance life and work and marriage and motherhood and self-care and health.
And what I’ve discovered for myself is that being able to feel that validation while being in the same room is magical. There is no substitute for a hand on the arm, an embrace after an emotional moment, or someone looking you in the eye and nodding that says “I feel you, friend. You’re not alone.”
Which is exactly why social media can be such a poor substitute.
If you REALLY want to feel human again and start feeling more like yourself, the best way I have found to do exactly this is to physically surround yourself with people who understand and won’t judge.
It is so scary to open up and admit that you’re struggling. It’s one of the most vulnerable things to say in a society full of highlight reels and shiny happy pictures of moms who seem to have it all together. But I am in the unique position of having access to the inside world of hundreds and hundreds of moms who, while they adore their children and families and wouldn’t trade any of it, feel like they’re just flat out failing at all of it.
And so this is what I want you to know:
Surrounding myself with women like me who understand my specific struggles has been like letting the pressure out of a pressure cooker that is life with children, specifically with a special needs child. Literally two minutes before I began typing this, I sobbed to a friend whose child also has autism about how difficult our first few weeks of school have been. I don’t have to explain to her how vulnerable it feels to send any child off to kindergarten, much less one with different abilities. I don’t have to explain to her how I have to fight for him on a daily basis. She knows, and to feel understood in this way lifts a thousand pounds off of my shoulders. To get help with anything I’m facing is just icing on the cake.
Connect with the women in your life who understand what it’s like, and make it one of your top priorities. Cry over coffee, laugh over wine, but get face to face with them and feel the relief of being understood and heard.
And get vulnerable! You may believe your friend has it all together but maybe she thinks the same thing about you! Open up and you will be surprised at the connections you make.
This is exactly why I put together the Strength in Mothers Retreat (in Austin, TX September 27-29th). I have witnessed the incredible power of women coming together and connecting face to face, and I knew this was something that would not only benefit the women in my community but is NECESSARY in our current world.
Gather with me in one of the greatest cities in the country, connect with the other women who have committed to the same goals and are anxious to meet and support you.
And today through Monday ONLY, I’m going to make it more beneficial than EVER for you to join us.
I want you to find that special friend that gets you and is struggling too, and I want you to bring her with you – for the cost of one ticket. I have been brainstorming ways to make this retreat the most beneficial it can be, and I know that having an accountability partner to learn and grow with you at the event is one of the best ways to do this!
AND not only that, I have decided to add a 4 week accountability track to the retreat to keep you in that retreat mindset for the long-haul. After you get home, we’ll have group calls and action items for 4 straight weeks to keep you feeling supported, understood, and moving towards your goals with a healthy mindset!
This is in addition to the three guest speakers/instructors, the workshops by me, the food, the pool, the relaxation, the magical city of Austin. This is a NO-BRAINER.
So grab a girlfriend and give yourself the gift of a REAL vacation – not the “trip” you normally take where you are chasing toddlers and making meals and feel more exhausted when you return than when you left. This connection will fill your tank and with the accountability partner and track, you’ll be ready to transform your entire life.
I’m here if you have questions!
ACTION: Reach out to a friend today. Be honest with her about how you’re feeling. See how great it feels! (Invite her to the retreat!)
PS – imagine yourself here, sipping wine (or Juice!) by the pool with other moms who have got your back and are here to support you.
Retreat sponsored by: